The Pit of Nefius

Click here to download a free pdf of this dungeon!

D&D Next and Filth

I finally got a chance to sit down and play a game of D&D Next. Things started out simple enough with some lord approaching our merry band of companions and requesting that we try and rescue his son, who had last been seen being kidnapped by bandits.

No one (players or DM) realized we were actually in a John Waters movie.

Before leaving town, the Cleric of Pelor bought a costume and dressed as a noblewoman with a large hoop skirt.

Throughout most of our adventure through The Caves of Chaos, the halfling rogue Bobo, hid beneath the cleric's skirt. The Cleric would then enter the room, fire a Radiant Lance with one hand and lift his skirt with the other, unleashing the halfling.

Our group's first encounter was with a sleeping ogre. Things were going rather well for us and then the halfling ended up in front of the ogre and hit a string of high rolls. The ogre being quite tall, the halfling being quite short, and the rogue's player calling out his actions through a haze of Bud Light Lime, led to the ogre's penis being cut off.

Since the ogre's junk weighed less than ten pounds, the wizard promptly picked it up with a Mage Hand and imbued it with a Light spell. We named it Mortimer.

Not reading the rules carefully, Mortimer was kept floating near the ceiling to provide excellent illumination as we traveled through the goblin caves, killing, looting, and burning.

Los Tiburon

Telecanter Thursdays

All items listed below were dreamed up using Telecanter's Epic Table of Spell Like Effects.

The Staff of Telos Petri Kosovich (TPK Staff) - 007 

AOE - Utility, Utility - 60 - Permanent - Alter - Humanoid Link: Frédéric Michel

The Staff of Telos Petri Kosovich looks to have once been a shepherd's crook, but a fist sized diamond, held by three cords made of white gold, has been added to the center of the crook. The wood of the staff appears rotten, but is fantastically durable, and the suspended diamond glows a soft white.

The TPK staff has two powers.  

Conjure Flesh Golem  - Turns all living tissue with a 60' diameter circle into one structurally humanoid mass of barely intelligent life. The golem follows the basic commands of its creator until it is physically destroyed. The staff absorbs any souls of creatures transformed in this way.

Polymorph Other - Turns all living creatures within a 60' diameter circle into a random, small or medium sized farm animal (pig, goat, chicken, dog, pony, cat, mouse, etc). The transformation is complete in the sense that all creatures souls are absorbed by the TPK staff, and the animals behave and think as animals, not as shape shifted adventurers. This change is permanent.

Each use of the TPK staff requires one full week to process its absorbed souls and recharge. If creatures containing souls are killed by the staff it will take a full month before the staff can be used again. If a soul is extracted from the staff before the week is up it can be used for resurrection/re-purposing. Any souls not extracted before the week is up are permanently gone.

The Platinum Coin of Multitasking - 008

Wielder - Utility - 70 - 6 turns - Conjure - Human Link: Museum of Fine Arts, Boston

The Platinum Coin of Multitasking is a 2" solid platinum coin with a ridged edge. Each side of the coin shows a profile of the person currently holding it. When not in the possession of anyone the coin shows its weight and measurements on each side. Its magical effects can only be used by full blooded humans.


The coin can be activated once per day and doing so will conjure a perfect replica of the user that will last for one hour. The replica and the user have shared consciousness, senses, and stats. It is 100% the same mind, body, personality, ethics etc as the user and would be virtually impossible to distinguish from the "real" version. The replica cannot be dominated, but it could be susceptible to charms and suggestions in the same way the user could be.


When the replica is conjured, the health pool of the user is effectively doubled (e.g., a warrior with 10hp is now two warriors sharing a pool of 20hp). If the health pool is completely depleted both the replica and the user collapse to the ground either dead or unconscious.

The Shadowsmith's Lantern - 009

AOE - Utility, Utility - 60 - 1 turn - Delude - Shadow Link: The Allyn House

It is said that a powerful court wizard created this lantern as a gift for a thief that saved his son. The lantern can be used as a standard hooded lantern but it never runs out of fuel. By manipulating the hood of the lantern, the user can also produce two magical effects.

Shadow: Activating the shadow setting allows the user to see in total darkness and move through shadows as if invisible.

Light: The lantern begins to produce a bright, bluish/grey light that prevents all objects within 60' of it from casting a shadow.

Only one of these effects can be active at a time. When activated it takes one turn for the effect to kick in, and the lantern must be turned off completely for one full turn between each use.

Stoic Does It Right

Stoic Studios is a testament to how things should be done. Their concept is solid, their art is mind blowing, and their choices in collaborators is exceptional.

But most importantly, their communication is transparent and beyond phenomenal.

We're living in such an awesome time! Long live the independent.

Shadow's Hand Assassin's Guild

Waterfalls

004 - Bryan Olesen - Ash Cave - Hocking Hills Ohio

The Taxman's Clearing

The Taxman's Clearing

Click to download a free PDF of the Taxman's Clearing!

That Guy

Telecanter Thursdays

All items listed below were dreamed up using Telecanter's Epic Table of Spell Like Effects.

Ichabod's Ruby - 004

Touch - Defense - 10 - 1 day - Compel - Dead Photo: Giazotto Collection - 1481

This large, uncut, ruby appears to be lit from the inside with a hateful glow.

Once per day, the gem can be placed in the eye socket of a completely clean skull (bone/teeth only). The eye sockets of the skull will begin to glow a bright red and the skull will begin to float in a circle around the user of the gem. The circling skull will absorb the next X points of damage (depending on skull type) before falling to the ground, lifeless once more.

When the skull falls to the ground there is a 20% chance the ruby will crack and become useless. In combat the skull always appears to be making direct eye contact with all attackers (simultaneously) and certain skulls may even inspire fear (dragon, cyclops, demon, child, etc).

Devon's Shield of Defending - 005

Touch - Transport (x3) - Sight - 1 round - Shield - Demi-human Photo: Utagawa Kuniyoshi

Devon was a paladin that died defending his party from the last three blows of an ancient red dragon.

When activated, the wielder of this shield will automatically block the next three attacks against members of his party that occur that round (as long as he can see them). The attack is physically blocked by the shield, and the wielder of the shield is automatically teleported around the battlefield to accomplish these blocks.

After blocking three attacks the wielder is placed back in the exact same spot where he began and must save or be disoriented for the next round.

Archimedes' Drawbridge - 006

Distance - Utility - 50 - 2 hours - Conjure - Infernal Photo: Alexander Buschorn

A large stone column covered in strange glowing runes stands at the edge of a giant chasm. The runes light up in a fiery orange pattern making which causes the column to appear cloaked in flame.

Touching the column summons a Large Pit Fiend.

After being summoned, the Pit Fiend spends approximately five minutes staring angrily at the individual, or group, that summoned him. Will not speak during this time.

After this period of intense intimidation the Pit Fiend begins casting an elaborate spell, in total silence, while making direct eye contact with the person that summoned him. At the conclusion of the spell, jets of infernal green flame shoot from the Pit Fiend's hand and create a bridge of fire across the chasm.

The Pit Fiend then sits down (dejectedly) and waits for the party to cross the bridge. The flame does not harm anyone walking across the bridge, it just looks "Brütal". Should anyone in the group that summoned the Pit Fiend fall from the bridge, or come into combat while on the bridge, the Pit Fiend will immediately come to their aid.

The bridge lasts for 2 hours, and the Pit Fiend will remain on this plane until the party has completely crossed the bridge, or the two hours have elapsed. The Pit Fiend was tricked by a mortal wizard to create this bridge and does not like to talk about what actually happened.

Should the Pit Fiend be summoned and then killed he cannot be summoned again for 1d6 weeks.

Smith's Protection Service

Click to download a printable PDF and 79 guild member hierarchy

Objectives and Objections: SPS seeks to become the most trusted name in protection. They actively oppose most thieves guilds and often work in concert with local authorities to ensure the security of their clients and cargo.

Castles

The Painted Monastery of Bucovina - Romania Attribution: Gary Cook

Nargad's Hideout

NARGAD'S HIDEOUT

• http://donjon.bin.sh/d20/dungeon/

• Random Seed: 1339101483

• Layout: Cavernous

• Size: Tiny

• One square is 10'x10'

• The cavern was dug out of a hill and through numerous large boulders

• Most rooms are little more than dirt, stones and roots, but a few areas were sloppily hewn through boulders too large to move or dig around

• In weaker areas, wooden beams or crude stone walls help hold the ceilings

Sir Bearington

Starting with a classic

Telecanter Thursdays

All items listed below were dreamed up using Telecanter's Epic Table of Spell Like Effects.

The Gaudy Glove of Luther Fox - 001

AOE - Attack, Attack, Attack - 70 - 1 day - Delude - Metal Photo: Michal Maňas

The Gaudy Glove of Luther Fox is made of bright purple crushed velvet, covered in a myriad of tiny reflective disks (sequins), and cinches tightly at the wrist. Across the top of the knuckles are three large red gems that the wearer can fire 70 feet as a normal projectile. When the fired gem hits an object it generates a sphere of magnetic magic 70 inches in diameter that lasts for 24 hours. Each gem has a different effect:

1. All metal in the sphere and each piece that enters is randomly polarized to attract and repel
2. All metal that enters the sphere is polarized in such a way that it will be forcefully attracted to every other piece of metal in the sphere
3. All metal that enters the sphere is polarized in such a way that it will be forcefully repelled from every other piece of metal in the sphere

The gems are consumed on use and can only be replaced by red gems of at least 1000gp in value. When a new gem is added to the glove it takes 24 hours to charge before it can be fired. Whenever a fired gem strikes an object and activates a loud "BWAAAAAH" noise is made.

Hooray pseudo-science!

The Bronze Guardian - 002

AOE - Attack - Sight - Permanent - Divine - Space/Dimension Photo: Steve Linster

A 10' tall bronze statue of a cloaked, seated figure rests in a T intersection at the end of a long hallway. As creatures walk down the hallway towards the statue its head slowly begins to rise and two points of light appear where eyes would be in the dark recesses of the hood.

Should the head lift fully and the eyes reach full brightness (approximately half way down the hall), any extra-planer creatures within its field of vision are immediately transported back to their home plane.

Each step taken towards the statue causes the head to lift slightly. If approaching creatures stop moving, the head stops. If they walk away/backwards, the head lowers.

Plato's Darling Disguise Kit - 003

AOE - Utility - 50 - 1-6 hours - Evoke - Monster Photo: Agaric House Antiques

This ornate leather and brass box is a must have for lady adventurers on the go!

Once per day, if a female opens the box and speaks the power word, 4d6 small oozing creatures, wearing bows, manifest and await her orders. The creatures appear to be made of some sort of lotion and are constantly dripping and rubbing themselves to maintain their vaguely humanoid forms. No residue ever seems to actually drip off them however.

These creatures can create and use any type of mundane/sterile/non-toxic mud, paint, or powdered mineral blend to disguise or change the appearance of any mundane object or creature as directed by the user.

The creatures are able to move within 50' of the box, but if the box is closed or moved they vanish instantly. The creatures last for 1d6 hours and work tirelessly. They could completely change the appearance of a stolen carriage and six horses in ~2 hours. Disguises created by these creatures are done with the same level of proficiency as the master of a powerful thieves guild.

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